Dear Michael Pollan:

I thought you might be interested in the conversation I had in Safeway last week. My clerk was the young surfer-dude type, stocking the yoghurt shelves right next to where the butter was supposed to be. (Did I mention that I hate Safeway? How can a grocery store be completely out of butter?)

Tanya: You don’t have any more butter in the back, do you?

Safeway Surfer Dude: Butter?

Tanya: Butter

SSD: What does it look like?

Tanya: Um… it’s yellow. It’s usually on these shelves right here.

SSD: Does it come in plastic?

I’m not making this up. That’s what he said. And that’s when I grabbed a yoghurt tube, jabbed it in his ear, and left the store.

(Not really.)

(But I wanted to.)

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