So, my son’s shampoo is full of phthalates, which might shrink his privates and decimate his sperm. And my daughter’s pajamas are probably carcinogenic. And AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Whew. Just had to get that out of my system. I’ve been reading this book:

It’s actually a great read. Two guys, whose environmental-agency job is to track the pollution in human bodies, decide to see if they can manipulate the poison in their own bodies according to whether or not they do things like use aftershave and eat tuna sandwiches. They basically use themselves as chemical guinea pigs. Their goal is not to scare me to death. (I don’t think.) It’s to show whether it’s possible, through consumer choices, to limit our chemical exposure.

As a bonus, they’re pretty funny guys.

But, the book cost me an extra $80 because I had to go buy a non-coated frying pan this morning. And now what do I do with the old one? Throw it in the garbage and wait for it to break down and end up in the bloodstreams of polar bears and AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Hand me that paper bag, please. I think I’m hyperventilating.